always.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

When i looked at people, I am jealous.
When i looked at people,i've been disappointed.
When I looked at people,i've known i've been forgotten.

and these are the people whom i should respect
but sometimes i wonder why they deserve my respect.

so i thought each time i felt that way,
i swept my feelings under the carpet
until i am so numb.
until everyone is in awe of me being so numb
and i thought everything is well
because you cannot let emotions determine your destiny.
and the more objective,the more you can get things done.

and i keep thinking why am i so numb?
and God just pulled out all my negative emotions yesterday
these are the reasons i've been numb.
and He said,"people can forget you,but your name will always be in My Hand."

when i look at my God,i know i am encouraged
when i look at my God,i know i am secured
when i look at my God,i know i am not forgotten.
when i look at Him, everything is different.
=DDDDDD

and no it aint an emo entry,i am just in awe,
there is Someone who knows me better than i know what i am.

Monday, April 28, 2008

hellos world!its 12.47am!pretty early eh?but i decided i should slp early so that i can wake up tmr to EXERCISE.haha.it time to be healthy again!=)

and recently i got addicted to the healing hands III on channel u at 10pm with mom.
and oh man more than the thrill and action and hilarious scenes in the show,the show director subtly makes you think a lot.
i love what the Dr Henry said once in the show,
"My aim in becoming a doctor is not to save people but to gave patients hope."
That just totally blew me away!

My aim is not to save people but to give them hope.

and oh can i tell you sth my mom really impacted that church doesnt hire cleaners to clean the church and that WE actually do the cleaning ourselves.i so swear i saw that smile she was trying to hide.:P

Saturday, April 26, 2008

HELLOSS!!
haha..seem like i am missing?
nah..just that i have too many blessings to count and list them down!!
so mabel hong here i am updating my bloggie!!lol...

alrighties..i simply LOVEEE my life.
i find myself each time i stepped into church, i do not want to get out.HAHA
maybe you should try that feeling too.=)

okies so where do i start my blessings?
asmah gave me some pimples powder and my face pimple just amazingly subsides
=) =) =)
i feel blessed cuz i dun need to waste $$ on beauty products.LOL
yuko even teach me how to lead a healthy lifestyle for nice nice face.
Nerissa gave me clothes the daughter cant wear.
jean my manager always let me off early when i finished my work
and nv scolded me when i am late for work!HAHA.
and btw they are all my colleagues.
=) =) =)
i can't explain how my job is really God-blessed!
and oh there is the wonderful wonderful joanne who is like my best friend but we are world apart
HAHA.
and how can i forget the cleaner auntie who is like my grandma who on 1 fine day decided to share with me her bread for teabreak! =)

and speaking of grandma
i suspect she is an angel sent out by God in disguise.
she wakes up every morning at 5am to cook for my lunch
so i can save $$$$$..
haha.and she feeds me with weird stuff at 6am which later i found out is chicken essense or milk or cereal so that i can last thru the day.
and my grandma calls me FAT!!!
when everyone thinks i am skinny
and even jamie commented that i've overworked.
and sometimes she even wait for me for dinner and mind you i come home 9pm almost everyday.
haha.
and she waits for me at the bus-stop when i reached home at 12.30am.
i swear i am superb guilty.
so now u guys know why i love my grandma so much! =)
cuz i swear i nv see some1 so pure so others-centred like her outside church!
dont you feel jealous?

anw, had heart to heart with dominic today
i was really impacted by what dom had said
"you know i never chase my leaders for numbers but i always chase them for the people under them are doing qt.
whether the people are connected to God.
and we are not called heart of God church for nth, we are called that to replicate the Heart of God like king david.
we are not called city harvest cuz we are not gg to the city for harvest
we are not called lighthouse cuz we are not gg to be the light in the nation(as our priority)
but we are called heart of God cuz we are people gg after His heart."

oh man! i am super excited for my qt later.
byes world! =)

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

hellos world. it's 1.58am now.

i realise i have been sleeping late and that i am really in my own world.HAHA.
When people think of being in your own world,
they usually linked it to negative stuff.
However, being in my own world doesn't necessary refer to bad things.

In fact, i really love being in my own world.
Because my world comprises of God,churchies and besties and my grandma =).
Church;people will often think as a religion,
as a mandatory thing that someone forces you to go every sunday.
Once you get committed to church, people think you are crazy.
Because the world doesn't place much emphasis on it.
But, God does because this is His Home where His presence dwells.
and how many of us know that God stance is always higher than what the world thinks? =)
Once you tasted the excellence of God, you won't settle for the greatness of the world.

I love my world because it consists the House of God.
I love the House of God because of my family in House of God.
We are a family.
We go through thick and thins together.
We laugh together with all the nonsense.
We cried together with all the discipleships(haha!)
When your dad walked out in your family/your siblings run away from home,
don't you ever feel the heartache?
Don't you always long to have them back?
This is how I feel when one of the family members left church.
That is why I called HoGc my family.

I asked Tracy one day why did she ever muster the courage of asking me to her church?
and she was like hey i was thinking how did i even managed to get you in church.
haha.amazing.how we flow eh? :P
btw, she had the courage because she simply wants to tell me Someone loves me so much, so so much,so much that is so unthinkable because of my emo blog(u can check my archives! haha).
HAHA!
amazing what technology can do yea?lol.

So, after that, my life has been radically changed since the day I stepped into HoGc.
Next time,if you got invited to church by me.
You got to know you have an emo blog too!LOL.
and i just want to pass down the same msg: Someone loves you so much, so so much,so much that is so unthinkable.

He's the reason each day I wake up,and I feel so loved.