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Friday, October 20, 2006

"Do not be afraid. From now on you will catch me." Luke 5:10

" Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me."John 14:1

oh Lord! You are really my God hearing my hearts tremble in fear this afternoon. i open my calender book i saw this quote that i copied long ago and you spoke to me with John14:1. yet i flip the pages so fast that i miss reading that page. You are truly a God that nv gives up. The first thing i opened my bible today as i reach home you gave me Luke 5:10! oh gracious Lord!

why i tremble in fear?
-i am in ushering ministry
(reasons of fear: i am afraid of knowing new people after meeting so many new people in life and got hurt by them, your heart can never be the same again. yesh we must forgive and forget. i did all that but the feeling of pain still lingers on. yesh even in church
my mom will disapprove my involvement in church, the house i live in will be chaotic again.)
-today is the day i officially quit hockey. i am scared. dun ask me why.i really love hockey a lot. it pains me a lot to give up on it just becuz of the realistic mom i have at home
(if not for your emotional blackmail, i can be a lot stronger)
-i'hv make up my mind to join photog, meeting new ppl again and again and i begin to hate that a lot.

i am scared.but i know i must trust Him. but i am only a little girl, there are times i fall too...

painful experiences can nv be erased even it is forgiven...