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Monday, July 17, 2006
Sitting here in the school com lab,
feeling very very cold, so tired of putting a facade of a clown, so tired of crying angry and happy. Becoming someon who is numb to all emoions. is something yet I cannot do. Today in the morning assembly, a girl from the debate socity gave a speech which i find it insightful and so relevant in many of our teenagers' lives. It is certainly thought-provoking. I admire her courage and dictation.Haha..a bit weird to say dictation. Anyway, it makes me realise I no longer want to hide. I just want to be myself. Be happy when I'm happy. Be angry with people who deserve my wrath. Feel like crying and I'll just cry. Having no obligations to fulfil.Yet, will it ever truly exist? Today start off as a bad day but ended with a light note. Life is like that, aint it? You will never know what is going to happen next. Moreover, you are going to search for the answers, not preparing a politically correct one. I wish life can go more of my way. I hate politically correct answers Alright. I'm aiming for 4As for promos since people are EXPECTING me to do so. So sick of hearing ''jerlyn, you are not performing up to expectations." Anyway, what do I have to be proud and stress of? I forgot I used to come from a school where almost everyone is pretty, committed to CCA and still can score 3A for their CTs in theirs top 5 college. Someone just jolted my memory. Guess what? I'm aiming to be one of the high-fliers. Turning negative into positive. Someone imitated me on Jon's blog. I really wonder who can be so 'bo liao'. All those readings my imitators tag on his blog, I just want to clarify that it wasnt me especially those with f word. Those who doesnt know me why may not know I for all the words cannot stand the f one. Call me a prude or what?I do not care. It actually reflects my upbringing. Yes, I do admit I do swear at certain occasions but I do not use such rude remarks loosely. If anyone just uses your name and start using f word around, I wonder would you feel insulted as I do? The reason why I do not respond. There is no point for me to do so. The imitator may react in a more negative ways which i dare not fathom. |